When mom sends me e-mails like this >>>

miss my wittle babies!

Tuesdays

Just took my first test. 

Aced it!

But holy moly me oh my, I just fell in love.

No not with a boy silly. 

Kinfolk magazine.

It is utterly adorable.

It celebrates spending time together as family and friends.

It's so beautiful. I just spend an obsessive amount of time on their website.

Check it out! If I wasn't a broke college kid, I'd so subscribe.

Alas, my money spending days are far behind me for now. 

Checked out the gym today & made a gym plan!

Now I just need to get my butt up and do it!

No more excuses! 

A Few Photos

A weekend filled with exploring idaho.

I found a farmer's market too! Yay for homemade soaps! 

A Brief Weekend Post

Rachael bought a venus fly trap. We played with that for a while.

I unknowly took pictures of myself via webcam.

I wrote copious amounts of letters instead of doing homework.

I went to a concert at a delicious burger place.

Yum black bean burger, sweet potato fries, & peanut butter cup shake. 

Treated myself to the freakin' weekend. 

Then I went to a party in a parking lot.

So much fun! & they actually had decent music.

Next day was yet another party, and it was also awesome!

Today was a lovely Sunday complete with a nutritious tuna salad!

One of my favorites! I love salads, it's so easy to just throw together

a bunch of yummy things and they taste lovely!

And that was my weekend. The end. 

Music Crush

In other news, I'm really connecting to this song.

I mean duh, I've aways loved Florence.

But it just makes me want to shake out all the bad & get the good.

Love it. 

Almost the 1st Day of Fall!

So Fall to me is a lot of things.

One is this movie. 

It's just a must on my autumn movie list.

(not that I have one, hm, project?)

Anyways, I've been dying to watch it all week.

To bad I'm in Idaho & not good ol' MA. 

Have a listen, & totally go watch Practical Magic!

Sandra Bullock & Nicole Kidman is pure magic, get it?! hehehe :) 

Wow, the lighting in my room sucks.

Also, it seems that this blog has just become a collection of ugly webcam pics.

Alas.

Today I was really sad. I just feel so down and out on myself.

My life, my body, you name it. 

But I decided that I need to stop. 

STOP.

I need to love myself. I need to be strong. 

Yes I'm away from home, yes it sucks, yes I feel lonely.

But it's time to make the best of this situation. 

Music Crush

I'm sad. 

Getting There

1. Newly dyed locks. Mine still in the process.

2. Calling the fam. The Pats lost, so it was a slightly pointless phone call.

3. Cleared my desk so I could spend my Sunday afternoon hitting the books. Yay!

Okay, okay. This is getting easier. 

My boxes finally arrived with my clothes (thank you Lord)

and week 2 isn't so bad.

I also got some care packages that caused some waterworks this morning.

It's been okay. Maybe I can do this.

Also, Operation Get Hot is beginning. Starting with the healthy eating!

No more chocolate or chips! My silly self is learning not to substitute food for comfort. 

Let's make this year count! 

Adventure

We made it through our first week at college! Yay!

After classes Rachael & I walked to the temple to do our Book of Mormon homework. Extra credit?

It was amazing, I want to spend every second there. 

Ooo also before that we went to Kiwi Loco. It's a local frozen yogurt shoppe. 

Let me tell ya YUM. It's actually better than Pinkberry & Red Mango, no joke. 

We are ready to begin our weekend!

Rachael & our new friends Taylor and Kelsey (they're from Hawaii, so jelly) came over for a wittle dinner!

Now we are watching Singin' in the Rain. Could life be any greater?

Tomorrow we are going on a grand adventure to Wal-Mart & I'm dying my hair.

Honestly, I love this. College is fun!  

So Like..

here's the thing. I LOVE grocery shopping. Is that weird? Yes it's probably weird. But I don't care because I love it. I think creating food, and taking care of your body is beautiful and I just love all the different choices. The grocery store makes me feel in control of my crazy life. Also, I love the festive-ness of the holiday season. Halloween themed oreos? m & m's? I mean c'mon. Who doesn't get excited. Not that I'm gonna eat those treats but still. Although speaking on the subject, I did buy a bunch of chips...and chocolate. In my defense they were multi-grain chips and dark chocolate. Also, being on my own is hard and I feel blue. So there. Yesyes, I know you shouldn't "eat your feelings" but damn it, this is hard.

Anywho back to the grocery store. I just have so much fun picking out my own things. Knowing that they're mine. I just can't believe I'm finally doing it. I'm on my own. Maybe I'll get a job at the grocery store, hmm. Is it strange to have so much to talk about about the grocery store?

Yesterday was my first experience shopping there by myself. Well, that isn't actually true. But it was the first time grocery shopping for me and me alone. It was the first time I had to heave cans of soup into my backpack and hike it back to my apartment. I loved it.

And although I'm splurging a bit on operation Get Hot (mom actually just sent me an e-mail that said operation G.H. I love it) I figure this week it is necessary. I really can't tell you how hard it's been. And for some reason, I can't cry. Let me tell ya, I've felt like cry more times than I can count, but the tears just won't come out. And that is frustrating for me because i love to cry. I'm a bit of a cry baby actually. I like to know that I am feeling something. I honestly said a prayer asking God to let me cry. Am I nuts or what?

But operation G.H. is in the works, no doubt about it. This week has been transition week & heal my ankle week. Next week, I'm gonna work it. I've gotta make all dem boys drop to their knees ;) But mostly I just want to feel comfortable in my own body. Woo here we go! Plans for a bright future start now!

Music Crush

throwback.

when you find out that cute boy in your class likes star wars...*melt*

A Rant

1. Eating my greens. Freshmen negative 15, hollah.

2. Accidentally taking a picture while chillin' between classes.

Ain't I purty? My head is huge.

Okay so, I'm really really homesick.

Like, I'm really missing MA.

This was probably expected, because I'm absolutely in love with New England. 

I thought going away would make me appriciate home more, and let me tell ya,

it has. 

I have been thinking all day that I want to go home.

I think I want to take a year off to make some dough, but I think I'll wait a couple years.

Also, I feel like I should transfer to BYU, because I have friends there.

But, I'm really unsure of that right now.

And then I wonder if maybe I should go to a MA state school because that would be cheap too.

Oh my goodness, I am just so conflicted.

I'm hoping that maybe I just feel this way because I'm not used to it,

but I'm just really not happy here.

I've made some friends, and the campus is beautiful, but i don't know. 

It's so different.

I know I need to give it a chance, and I will. I'm definitely sticking it out for the year.

I've just got to decide what to do.

I really don't know what's wrong with me.

I just feel like everyone is being fake nice and fake happy and forcing friendships.

I hate that! I like to naturally become friends.

Also, everyone is either married or an RM.

So I can't even befriend a guy because they're all expecting marriage.

I've already been asked if I was engaged. I moved my ring real quick. 

This is like living on Mars, seriously, where am I? 

Deep breaths. Deep breaths. 

9/11

My favorite breakfast.

Actually it's just my favorite treat. 

greek yogurt, peanut butter (obv.), blueberries, rasberries, flaxseeds & granola.

heaven in a bowl.

Today is 9/11, and I'm wicked homesick.

It's just a day that makes you think about the important stuff, and about the future.

So obviously I'm missing home & my family & my best friends. 

& I'm scared because my future is such a fog. 

At least I'm doing the college thing.

I had my first day of classes, &  right after I hit the books.

Hello studious emma. Whoa did I just say that?!

Now if only my ankle would heal up, I could work out & get hot. 

Those are the main goals, kick butt academically & get hot. 

No problem, I've got this. 

Hello September

Here are the weird things about Idaho:

everyone is married/engaged/preggo

they bring their babies to class

chapped lips all. the. time.

mormons love their hot chocolate

funny accents

there are hardly any trees

too many farm analogies

2 hours behind home

& of course i can't smell the ocean

.....i don't like that

Here are the cool things about Idaho:

the weather is b-e-a-Utiful, besides the dry air

I'm feelin' so spiritual, it's that kind of atmosphere

people are wicked nice

the boys are cute

i get to walk a lot, which i love

the frozen yogurt shop down the road is wayy cheaper than red mango & pinkberry, YES

im meeting people from all over

my classes dont suck 

being independent feels so good

I can't lie, I miss home. I miss my best friends. 

But, this actually doesn't suck. 

I could get used to it. 

Music Crush

Here We Go

A few gems from the past couple days.

I've arrived in Idaho.

What can I even say? 

It's dry, mormons are totally weird, they drink a surprising amount of hot chocolate.

But I love it.

I mean love is a strong word, but I definitely like it more than I thought.

I'm meeting people, I'm having fun, I'm exhausted.

Jet lag's a bummer. & my poor ankle's black and blue. 

But, classes start tomorrow and I'm excited.

Now if only my clothes would ship here faster! 

I feel like I'm leaving this post with so many words left unsaid.

But seriously, I'm friggin tired, & I've got to prepare for tomorrow.

It's a big day! 

Just my Luck

Oh, I mean that's okay.

I didn't want to spend my last day in MA on my feet anyways.

Yay, sprained ankle.